SAR WARS Chapter Five: The Republic Strikes Back

A long time ago in the tiny land of SingABall, far far away.

It had been 2 years since the start of the SAR Wars (SingABall Anti-Republic Wars). The SingABall Armed Forces, still hopelessly lost in the vastness of Ntu, wandered aimlessly around the North Spinal Core, still searching a way into the South Spinal Core.


--------------Meanwhile at the JEDI Council (Joint Elite Dean's Imperialist Council)--------------------

Yoyo-da: Students, how many you all failed?

Prof Bochup: ALL..hahahahaha....by the way, I really relished in the School of Bioscience's NEWEST CANTEEN...MMMMmMMMmm....BAKED RICE!!!

Yoyo-da: Eat only, you know how to. Serious, be.

Prof KNN: Come on guys. This war is raging. We need to find a way to sneak into SingABall and launch a counter-attack.

Yoyo-da: Good idea, you speak. How, but?

Prof KPKB: Here is the plan. We will let the students demostrate and strike. They will riot with card-boards saying "We Hate War". Then we purposely kill them and blame it on SingABall. The kaypoh United States of Angmo will SURELY come and keep nagging at SingABall not to fight, while PROVIDING US with WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION. HAHAHA, GREAT IDEA RIGHT?

Yoyo-da: Great idea, it seems like.

The President of Ntu nodded.

Yoyo-da: Idea, proceed with.

As usual, they ended their council with "May the As be with you".


----------At SingABall's Government Headquarter--------------------------------

PM Leeee: Ah Tieo ah, what the hell have you been doing? How come the army can get lost one? The SingABall peasants are getting annoyed liao leh. Many of those who are eligible for army.....all go chao keng and downgrade liao. At this rate, no more people to go to frontline liao.

Minister for MINistry of DEFeat (MINDEF)*, REAR ADMIRE** TIEO Ang Bak*** : Aiyo, Ntu sooooooooo BIG. Climb here, climb there, walk here, walk there. Paths that lead to nowhere. The first floor is sometimes B5 or 1....woah lao confusing man.

((*The idea of Defeat is to DEFEAT others. However for simplicity sake, instead of Ministry of Defeating Others, which may cause the poor administrators to strain their fingers while typing the Ministry's name and to also save costs, hence the title Ministry of Defeat was adopted, with no intention of a Ministry that deals mainly with Defeat. (Although in a way, the title fulfils itself.....speak no more, I shall.....)

**The Official Title of Rear Admire is somewhat like a Deputy Prime Minister (DPM). However, this title is one level up. Historically, in the History of SingABall, the title of DPM is only of a symbolic one and OFFEN, there were MANY DPMs. Therefore, in order for a clear and transparent succession plan for the PM, the title of REAR ADMIRE was adopted. There can be one REAR ADMIRE at a time, because, according to the then-PM, now SLOMT (SUPREME LORD OF MINISTER TUTOR) Leeee (GREAT-GRANDFATHER to CURRENT PM Leeee), who came up with the title, thought that to ADMIRE AT ONE's REAR (backside/butt/ass) properly, it will be good to have only one person doing so.

***TIEO ANG BAK........sounds like kanna red eye in teochew or hokkien. Hence the REAR ADMIRE rarely use his name in public and was always refered to the REAR ADMIRE.))

PM Leeee: Ah-Tieo, how can I pass the PM-ship to you? You really disappoint me. My son has ten more years to go before fulfiling the criteria to become the PM after you. So now, how? If I retract your Rear Admire-ship, then you will be xia-sueyed, I also will feel paisei, machiam I make the wrong decision to appoint you as my son's seat warmer. Cannot liddat one la.

REAR ADMIRE: Ok lor. I ask them to faster find the Head-quarter of the stupid Ntu JEDI Council. **grumble grumble**

Minister for Torturing All Students (TAS) ShagTaMa: I have something to say. A long time ago Ntu shared a common view, that is to TORTURE ALL STUDENTS, with my ministry, afterall, we were once an entity. I believe, the Renegade President of Ntu will adopt some of my ministry's idea. I have strong reasons to believe that THEY will incite students to riot and hold up banners and posters. In the process, they will kill them and blame it on us. The United States of Angmos, with their strong sense of justice and world peace, will definitely want to interfer and influence the outcome of the battle. We cannot allow that to happen. We need to prempt the RENEGADES!

PM Leeee: So what do you have in mind.

ShagTaMa: I have just allowed one more city campus to be built. It shall be named Sim. Together with Nus and Smu. I believe that our students will have the necessary man-count to overwhelm Ntu. They can die for all I care. As long as we have more students dying than Ntu, the world will side with us.......HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...and I have great plans to become the next REAR ADMIRE.....oops I mean....I like to ADMIRE your REAR.....my dearest overlord.....

PM Leeee: GOOD IDEA! GOOD IDEA! Actually I have thought of it already. Errr, Dad, can we go ahead with the plan?

Minister Tutor Leeee: All shall bow to my Authority. Errr, Father, can we go ahead?

Senior Minister Tutor Leeee: All shall succumb to my Influence. Errr, Pa, can we go ahead?

Supreme Lord of Minister Tutor Leeee: All shall LICK MY ARSE. I think it will be fun......ok...go ahead.....

Senior Minister Tutor Leeee: Yes, Pa........Ok...the plan can go ahead...

Minister Tutor Leeee: Yes, Father.......Ok.....Thumbs up for the plan.....

PM Leeee: Thanks DAD! OK.....ShagTaMa....JUST DO IT!!!!!

ShagTaMa: Your command is my life............

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Hence, bloody demostrations and riots by students erupted throughout SingABall and Republic of Ntu. Lives were lost...only the smart SingABall students stayed away doing their blogs. The rest.........gave their lives to the evil plans.

The United States of Angmos condemned SingABall and lauded support for Ntu and condemned Ntu and lauded support ofr SingABall. It was a politic see-saw.

Hence, the struggle for the Republic continues..........all will conclude in the next CHAPTER==>SAR WARS CHAPTER SIX: THE RETURN OF THE EXAMS..............